Tick-Tock, Tick-Tock…

Cha Cha real smooth!

This post is fleeting, much like the chance of TikTok ever going dark — because we are not ready for another trillion-dollar bailout. Should that day come, we will start washing and sanitizing our hands again, and Stanley Cup (I have never seen anything like it.) sales will plummet. Turmeric farmers will face catastrophic losses. Kale sales will nearly disappear overnight; we will be left with fewer yogis; hydration, exfoliation, and scrubbing until we’re down to the raw dermis will take a huge hit. It won’t be a pretty look. The product managers will struggle to strategize and innovate by moving that button by 2 pixels to the other left or changing its color to purple. Much like the perpetual government shutdown dance, we’ll find innovative and barely functional ways to dodge this digital doomsday.